Life · Love

What to expect when dating an anxious 20 something

Falling in love is supposed to be a joyous occasion. A period of excitement, happiness and mystery. However, it’s true what they say, you get a hell of a lot more than you bargained for – especially when that person is suffering with anxiety that can affect every aspect of their life. When falling in love with someone that suffers from anxiety, you really need to know what to expect, this will allow you to handle certain situations accordingly – it’s not always kisses and I love yous.

She doesn’t mean to nag

She doesn’t mean to nag you, she just worries more than you know. Is he working too much? Has he had breakfast? Is he spending too much time playing on his PS4? God that cough has been around for a while? When was the last time he got that check up? Believe it or not, it’s not because she wants to give you a headache, your wellbeing is very important to her and this is even more intense when anxious thoughts fill her head on a daily basis. Don’t flip out, understand why she is asking, she has your best interests at heart.

She needs your patience

Whether its making her mind up about where she wants to go or her wanting to leave a party early because she feels nauseous and on the edge of having a panic attack, you need to make sure you have the patience to deal with different situations. Anxiety can cause your GF to act irrationally and although you might not fully understand why she is panicking in the middle of a restaurant, you need to make sure you handle it in the right way – patiently and as understandingly as possible.

She needs to feel secure and reassured 

Insecurity is second nature to someone who suffers with anxiety. Whether that’s financial security or trust, be aware she will need reassurance that everything is ok from time to time. Don’t get mad if she acts out because she’s feeling a little insecure about your relationship, it’s not a personal attack, it’s an attack of her brain – literally. Be the shoulder she needs when she’s feeling vulnerable, she will need constant reassurance that there’s nothing to worry about.

She may feel irritated 

She over thinks everything, worries about everything and this can make her feel extremely irritated at times. She could get snappy and angry over the smallest of things due to a build of worry and stress. Arguments start to occur over insignificant reasons, let it pass – she doesn’t mean it.

She doesn’t always want to socialise

She might suffer with social anxiety and at times she would much prefer to have a night in rather than face the world. Bare this in mind before making plans, make sure she is feeling up to it before booking a table. You might not understand why she is turning down a date at her favourite Italian restaurant, and deep down she knows she should get herself out and fight the fear, but sometimes, it feels too much and she needs the safety of her little haven – home.

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You don’t have to understand, she doesn’t understand herself, just be there. You think its hard for you? Try being her, it’s not an easy illness to understand or deal with and not all people take it seriously. But unless you are in her shoes you don’t know how much exactly this can cripple her and drain the happiness out of daily activities. She has to deal with it regardless and your full support will give her a better chance.

 xo

It’s not just women who suffer with this illness, this is simply a personal experience. You can find out more here

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7 thoughts on “What to expect when dating an anxious 20 something

  1. I love this post it’s very honest and helpful, your blog looks great. I’m pleased to see you’re continuing with your writing and enjoying blogging you’ve always had a natural flare for words. X

    Like

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